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I'm head over heels this Indonesian guy. My concern is, even my seven year old son likes him a lot. I just want to make sure (not that we can be sure of anything in life) that my son wont get hurt (or me for that matter). We met online (yes, call me CRAZY)  and I like everything about him. I never met anyone as interesting as he is..he's in the special military forces and that really aroused my curiosity!
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The same like other men .
You have to keep in mind the following things:
1. Age
2.Military rank a.o the Unit in which the person is
3. Ethnical background ( Javanese/ Sundanese or ..........)
4. Education (only miltary background or with another extra education)
5. Social background
6.Where he lives
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I have read your posting at another topic.
Please be aware that the military have some strict rules regarding marriage esp. in intrafaith marriage .
They need permission from their C.O
And if you will marry him and migrate to indonesia you must be sure that you can live properly with him . (See pt 2)
The best thing to do is take a long vacation trip to him and see how he lives.
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In addition to pak Surya's recommendation
7. RELIGION (very important)
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Gracias. Sama sama
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On 24-10-2008 09:40 khristina0330 wrote:
I'm head over heels this Indonesian guy. My concern is, even my seven year old son likes him a lot. I just want to make sure (not that we can be sure of anything in life) that my son wont get hurt (or me for that matter). We met online (yes, call me CRAZY) and I like everything about him. I never met anyone as interesting as he is..he's in the special military forces and that really aroused my curiosity!
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Find a docter to get you some medication to get dearoused soonest, is my advice.
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On 24-10-2008 15:56 kiwimave wrote:
In addition to pak Surya's recommendation
7. RELIGION (very important)
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Thanks for the addition of Mr Kiwimave .
Thats is the biggest problem , esp yr friend is in the miltary.
But if you convert to Moslim than everything can be O.K , if you really love each others.
You must also keep in mind the future of yr son .
The salary of Indonesian Army officers are not so good , even the high rankings off.(the so called Pati=Perwira Tinggi).
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Maybe I misunderstood but Khristina is asking what Indonesian men are like. I suppose she is not asking for status, religion, salary of whatever but she wants to know the character.
Well Khristina Indonesian men are like men everywhere in the world. There are bad guys and there are good guys.
Some Indonesian men are quite macho (the Arabian kind) and there also soft and sweet men.
If there are some common things it's that men (and even more women) are not so straight forward like western men due to common culture, common behaviour. And maybe one thing more, generally they are more jealous than western men (but this can also be part of the attraction......  )
So if you think you have found the one then go for it but if I may say so, first think of your son as he is still very young. On the other hand - and this is certainly another common thing - Indonesians are fond of children. Everything depends on your own expectations, your own kind of view. Book a flight and meet him, see how he lives. Invite him to your ow country so that you get the chance to see his daily life and the other way around. Good luck!
(where are you from Khristina?)
Anne Mieke
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Ku menanti seorang kekasih, yang tercantik yang datang di hari ini (Iwan Fals)
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On 24-10-2008 21:04 Anne Mieke wrote:
Maybe I misunderstood but Khristina is asking what Indonesian men are like. I suppose she is not asking for status, religion, salary of whatever but she wants to know the character.
Well Khristina Indonesian men are like men everywhere in the world. There are bad guys and there are good guys.
Anne Mieke
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A.M its true , there are bad and good guys too.
In case of K there are at least 2 big problems , his job (military ) ,and differences in religion.
The other point like higher salary (ranking) is also very important for a decent live in indonesia.
It has nothing to do with being macho .
F.e , a young officer , a second luitenant from AKABRI ( Mil.AC) have always Indonesian girlfriend and later Indonesian woman as wife .
They have another standard of living .
Most of them can get a luit.col or colonel rank at the end of his carrier .
Only a happy few , can get a general rank.
Believe me , its not easy to be a soldiers wife in Indonesia.
Of course depends on his unit ,regular or special force .
I have seen it for 3 generation in my own family .
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There is not such a thing as "indonesian men". The country is simply too large to have a typical Indonesian.
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Amore, more, ore, re, probantur amicitiae. Si hoc legere scis nimium eruditiones habes.
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On 26-10-2008 19:35 Nemesis wrote:
There is not such a thing as "indonesian men". The country is simply too large to have a typical Indonesian.
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Yep, that's another thing which is very true...........
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Ku menanti seorang kekasih, yang tercantik yang datang di hari ini (Iwan Fals)
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Well, when my daughter reaches the age of 15 years old, she has to go abroad and out of RI......cause I wouldn't be glad if she get acquaintance with and wants to marry an Indonesian man of the nowadays generation. Get already nightmares right now by only thinking about it.
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A. He is 31
B. He was a commander of his unit when we met, now he is undergoing intensive 5-month training bec. he's being profiled as a Major (I dont understand these things.....thats according to him) He's from this special unit called kopassus.
C. He was born I think in Bandung, Im not sure cuz he said that where his parents are from.
D. Education??? No idea, all I know is that he graduated from a military school thats why he said even if he is young, he has a higher rank compared to his subordinates who are much older than him.
E. Social background??? No clue! I know his entire family is military. His father is a retired 2 star general and now a member of the Indonesian parliament. A younger bro who is also in the military, a sister married to another officer....
F.He lives in Bandung...Jl Kartika ll Kpad geger kalong..... wherever that place is
H. He is Muslim, Moeslim...I dont know how you spell it.
I dont think Im ever gonna hear the end of it from MY FAMILY if I convert to his religion and I dont want to...he did mention to me before that he has a friend married to a catholic lady and his friend is also in the military. They now both live in Indonesia. He did say that he respects my religion and will not ask me to change it if I dont want to.
Why is it "NOT EASY TO BE A SOLDIERS WIFE IN INDONESIA?" Whats the difference with other countries? Will I hardly see him? Will he be away most of the time?
He said he will spend Christmas here in my country (Im from Manila, Philippines).
Money wise, Im not too concerned about it. I have a pretty good job, and I asked him if we do get married, is he gonna allow me to work...he said yes...are there jobs for women in Indonesia????
I did plan to visit him a couple of months ago but I figured he should come and visit me first.
Im sooooooooooo into him that I even enrolled myself in Bahasa Indonesia class. I can actually converse in Indonesian..well, not that good yet :-)
long distance relationship is just too complicated. Maybe ill just take NKP-2005 advise and go get a doctor. 
How many wives can they have?
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At this moment is his rank captain infantery , oppointed bij the speciale forces Kopassus .
Graduated from de Akabri (Mill academy ).as second luitenant around 22-23 years .
31-32 year already Mayoor ?
It means he can make carrier , at least Luit.Col / Colonel .
Maybe a one star general in the future . See also his network .
His social background seems O.K to me .
Esp. if he come from Sunda ( I am also a Sundanese  he he he ) and members of my family have also serve in the army .3 generations long .
An officer by a fight unit , and special forces must always move to another places .
And his wife must also go with her husband.
They can only have 1 wife , like western men. 
Sorry for my tarzan english 
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Where is Sunda? Is that where Bandung is? Is he Sundanese like you? Howcome you did not serve in the military like your family?
Isn't it the Muslims can have more than one wife? Please forgive my ignorance 
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On 28-10-2008 08:28 Surya Atmadja wrote:
Sorry for my tarzan english
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Saya pikir bahwa bahasa Inggris anda baik sekali :-)
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Sunda is West Java , bandung is the capital of west Java .
After my graduate from high school in 1966 , i want go to A.A.L ( Navy Marine Academy -Surabaya) .
My uncle was at that time Navy Colonel ( retired as 2 * Admiral) .Graduated from Dutch Marine Academy.
There are also Police generals too in our family.Of course they are retired or deceased .
Some of my best friends are chosing AMN . They make also carrier . Also retired (55 year) .
Thats why retired high ranking officers become a businessmen , or politician .
They are to young to do nothing.
My father is not happy about my choise , and send me to Europe .
Still living there.
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On 28-10-2008 07:35 khristina0330 wrote: E. Social background??? No clue! I know his entire family is military. His father is a retired 2 star general and now a member of the Indonesian parliament. A younger bro who is also in the military, a sister married to another officer....
F.He lives in Bandung...Jl Kartika ll Kpad geger kalong..... wherever that place is
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Geger Kalong is an area for (mostly retired) army men. It's a higher middle class area. That means that your friend or his father aren't definitely big shots in corruption land. A good sign.
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I'm glad to know that. Terima kasih.
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On 29-10-2008 02:23 khristina0330 wrote:
I'm glad to know that. Terima kasih.
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Big shots ?
Depends (tergantung?) point of vieuw.
A captain (or wouldbe mayor ) and a mayor general (R) a.o a politician (M.P) are normal people .Of course they are not like the average man in the street , but believe me , they are normal people .
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Ok and now some useful practical information for her…somebody have to tell her, right?
Average Indonesian men are lazy and very conservative. They don’t accept any woman emancipation. Woman belongs in the kitchen and do other household things (like we have 30 years a go).
Monogamy is a strange for them. You have to chair him with others…
Think twice girl! When you feel attracted to Asian looking men my advice is to look for one in your own country where you can find one who is already more civilize.
Also keep in mind that there could be an economical reason for him to get in touch with a western woman….
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On 29-10-2008 09:07 ouwe bekende wrote:
Also keep in mind that there could be an economical reason for him to get in touch with a western woman….
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Sure , of course 
Pse read the posting of Yogya-Bali : That means that your friend or his father aren't definitely big shots
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On 29-10-2008 09:07 ouwe bekende wrote:
Think twice girl! When you feel attracted to Asian looking men my advice is to look for one in your own country where you can find one who is already more civilize.
Also keep in mind that there could be an economical reason for him to get in touch with a western woman….
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Im Asian. Im from the Philippines. Big shots? I dont care if he has money or not. I have my own and I can definitely share that with the man I love. But dont think Im naive.
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On 29-10-2008 09:07 ouwe bekende wrote:
Think twice girl! When you feel attracted to Asian looking men my advice is to look for one in your own country where you can find one who is already more civilize.
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Are you saying Indonesian men are not that civilized? In what manner? 
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On 29-10-2008 10:20 khristina0330 wrote:
...
Are you saying Indonesian men are not that civilized? In what manner?
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In what manner? I thought I was very clear and give some examples.
Read my posting again!
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My 4 older sisters married to Indonesian men. None of them have the same character but one thing for sure.....they all faithfull to my sisters : o ) Two of them just celebrated their golden Wedding Anniversary : o )
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Winter lover : o )
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