Ok found this site and there seems to be a lot of information here but maybe someone could give me some more specific advice.
I came to work in Indonesia in August last year, after a few days in a local bar met one of the bar girls, oh that sounds bad does`nt it, but when you have a
child to raise and finding work is hard enough any job will do, so the job is not through choice but necessity.
Anyway like most stories I suppose we got to talking and found out she was looking for love not sex, well after two years on my own after a break-up I was
looking for the same.
So we started dating and were inseperable for the 5 weeks that I was working in Indonesia, a lot of my friends thought it was lust not love and would not
last, so after returning to the UK, very sadly I might add, we continued to stay in contact everyday by SMS, email once a week and more recently by telephone.
So I found myself asking my company for time off over the Xmas period to come visit her and to see if the feelings are/were still the same, to which I am
very happy to report that nothing has changed and that we are still both very much in love with each other, so that brings me on to my questions which I hope will be answered here.
For practicle and obvious reasons I would like to be with her all the time, not possible in Indonesia as the work is bad and the situation here is not the
best, so my only real choice is to marry her and bring her and her daughter back to the UK, I have asked her family about marriage and they are delighted,
they are also very understanding and know the many hassles that I should have to go through to marry thier daughter!
1, Circumcision, I`m not circumcised, and no one is touching my bits that I have owned for 42 years with no problems, her parents accept this, but will there be problems eg will the priest or Iman want to see my bits? lol.
2, Religion, Point blank I will not change my religion to Islam because it is not something I believe in, not that I actually have a religion, I follow my
own path to god, so regard myself more as spiritual, I believe every human should love each other and get along, regardless of religion, so her parents have said as long as I go along and say the few words to become muslim, more of a PR thing for the friends, other family members and bystanders etc, once we are done and dusted with ceremonies etc, I just be my normal self again!, is this OK?, even if it sounds hypocritical.
3, UK entry, this is probably my biggest concern, now I`m not a rich man, her parents know this, I own no property I just rent a flat, I have a reasonable
job earning £25k a year, not great, but better that a lot of people in the UK! what is the situation with immigration, in the UK we seem to be happy to let
half of Europe come into our country with no qualifications or able to speak English, I have worked all my life and paid my taxes I feel that if I marry this
Indonesian I should be able to bring her and her child into the Uk, she wants to work and can speak perfect English, but what is the true situation, I need
to know because I don`t want to go through all the hassle of engagement, marriage a lot of expense only to be turned down by my government, especially of a concern is the fact that she is Muslim, what with all the terrorist stuff going on.
She is just a down to earth girl who I love very much, and would be so happy to give her a better life, or am I being a complete fool thinking a beautiful
young lady 15 years younger than me is really into me and just wants a passport out of the situation in Indonesia, that last comment is by no means what I/we feel between us, I`m just being carefull.
Taking into account the short time we have been together, am I rushing into this too fast, I must admit I do feel a little pressured!,I was with my last
English girlfriend for six months before we got engaged and that is where we stayed for 16 years never got married as it just did not seem nessesary
Would love to hear from other Indonesian ladies who have come to the UK, more imortantly with a man who did not have money!!, also if you have a child before you came to the UK, how was the integration into school, especially if your child could not speak English.
You see many important questions which I hope many of you can answer.
Best wishes Alan, Rani & Putri
PS I will probably have many more questions after this thankyou