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dear Dutch,

My symphaty for you - after so many things you sacrifice, religion, your wealth, your feeling - then BOOM, you can see the real her . Be strong and may God bless and help you. I am blind to the law, unfortunately. You can ask to more people at http://www.expat.or.id/
You might find other people from other countries who have similar experience there.
I choose not to hate people based on where he/she comes from, anyway!

Regards

WJ




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wow Harto,

i can't help but see some truth in your response (i lived in indo 6 months 3 years ago)but also feel great sadness at it. what negative energy those people with that view must have. astaga! I know the dutch did wrong (i am half dutch) but like the germans and the world wars that is surely history. If that negative energy continues today, i wish nothing but peace and happiness to those who suffer from it. harus ada lebih cinta di dunia sekarang no? (more love in the world no?) Emoticon: Shiny



sasak
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Hello DutchGuy,
Before I answer your question, I would like to know if you really married in the Islam way in Indonesia (wich mean you have the book "Buku Nikah" from the departemen agama Republik Indonesia)?
Than maybe I can answer your question.
I also would like to know if your mariage is registrated at the Dutch ammbassy in Jakarta.
Greetings Sasak



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Hi dutch guy,

I sympatized about your dilema with your wife.

As the other guy said you are too good for her. Obviously she married you with an intention and 1 intentional reason only " MONEY".
Sorry but that`s what I could see according to your own words.

I don`t think any one should get married for the wrong reasons appart for love.

I disgusted by the people who have to bring the innocent kids in to this life, and jeopredising they well being, for the sake of selfishness.

Too many unhappy and lost kids out there who cry out for special help, infact some of them are going to the wrong direction or commiting suicide.

So think twice before even bring the innocent one in to life. Also becareful who you married with.

I am indonesian chick who live in New zealand for 15 years and been married with the local, he wanted to have kid but I didn`t want to, so he was welcomed to find another female for that purpose, and We finally divorced and am happy as ever with my dicission.

I did make a mistake to marry the guy just to make my parrents happy. I was too young at that stage and even I knew that the guy was not the right man for me.

Now I do love my new dutch bf and we are connected in so many levels.
The levels of understanding, maturity, and spiritually.

We met on the net but we talked alot and saw each other through the cam chat.
We never met in person though even we know each other for 6 years, but he is comming here on november to see me, and to see how thing goes.
He also invites me to visit him in Holland next year.

We both Leos and we so clicked in, in soooooo many ways....and see things in the same obsticle.

So I think what I` trying to say is basicly, get to know each other and swap the point of views before marrying any one, and see what the other person is really like, rather than marrying the wrong person and getting moreinto trouble.

The feeling for each other is gotto be mutual nothing less nothing more.



BR~~~

ratubanten
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Hey dutchguy, I think you shouldn't worry about the baby, if you're sure the baby is yours, according to indonesian law the nationality from the baby must be followed the nationality from the baby's father. In this case, your wife want to divorce you (has she good reason for that ?), you are the one who want to fight for your marriage, so actually you are in the strong positions. You still love her very much, just like LONDOH said, just refuse if she wants divorce. I think, then your wife get problems, but you must be really sure that she wants divorce without any strong particularly reasons. If there's no solutions at all, just dump her, find another woman who loves and cares about you, not for what you have. I'm indonesian woman, married with dutch for almost 7 years, I live in Holland for 6 years, we have two daughters, that's why I know a little bit how it works.




kiwimave
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Dutchguy1000, you said your wife forced you to be Muslim, right? So your wife should also be Muslim then. Then it's easy, you can consider your wife to be your property and you can do with her whatever you want, just like your car or your dog. I don't think she can divorce as a Muslim wife. Just use the good part of Islam also, you can still marry 3 other women Emoticon: Wink


Gracias. Sama sama

sidia
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On 29-11-2005 15:07 kiwimave wrote:
I dont think she can divorce as a Muslim wife. Just use the good part of Islam also, you can still marry 3 other women Emoticon: Wink


Meneer K ,
I think you dont know anything about he Law in Indonesia.
The U.U. Perkawinan and the U.U. Perkawinan Islam.



Bisa dicek mas . http://omsid.multiply.com/

sidia
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On 29-11-2005 14:35 ratubanten wrote:

*LONDOH said, just refuse if she wants divorce.

*I think, then your wife get problems,

*but you must be really sure that she wants divorce without any strong particularly reasons.


You cannot refuse a divorse , maybe try to delayed it.

She have not any problems , what kind of problems?The only problem is that she will divorce from her husband.
Family is at her hand.The ( bule )husband must give her money for living during the marriage.

Strong reason ? : what kind of strong reason.

A woman in Indonesia have almost the same rights like her sisters in holland.




Bisa dicek mas . http://omsid.multiply.com/

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dear mr. dutch guy.
have your problem solved?
i try to give u explanation about legal side of indonesian law concerning yr next baby.
But as u know legal advice not easyly open in public consumes. And as i working at legal office, i wll help for your problem. So sent your email address and your contact number (if possible) to my email : liza_indo2000_yahoo.com. and i wll reply yr problem soon.
thanks. bye.



bassi
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I thought a moslim women cannot divorse because her religion,
I read that she can get all also a private chauffeur, so maybe she is the one who already go strange with another men, and maybe her pregnant can be from some one else possible.
She now wanted to blackmail you with the future child.
Go divorse from her is she really wanted, go strange if yo wanted, a moslim men may hold 3 wifes, make her jalouse.
Look to your own future!!
Firstyou most look or she really want to divorse, or they are hormones, when a women is pregnant, she can be overreact sometimes.
But really if you cannot talk with her in normal conversation, and wanted to trick you on different way, thats not good, and about her family, no problem if you go talk with them, maybe they also diagree from what the women do now.
Please live relax, and she raully want this, you can wish her good luck and go further with your live.



sidia
User
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On 01-12-2005 12:55 bassi wrote:


I thought a moslim women cannot divorse because her religion


wrong again, too much bullshit story in the world about islam/ muslim.

Only catholic cannot divorce , but also possibble with the special permision of ther pope .


Bisa dicek mas . http://omsid.multiply.com/

aponto
User
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On 01-12-2005 14:49 sidia wrote:

...


wrong again, too much bullshit story in the world about islam/ muslim.

Only catholic cannot divorce , but also possibble with the special permision of ther pope .

...........................................................................................................................................
Dear man/woman,

Bullshit is Emoticon: Puh! eople who put their private matters on the internet .
Aponto




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