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LelyCabe
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You Know You're Indonesian When...
Your stomach growls when you don't eat rice for a day.

You believe kecap ABC could turn bad cooking to gourmet food.

You talk during a movie.

You eat fried rice in the morning.

You prefer Versace or Moschino jeans over Gap or Levi's.

You don't think Jim Carrey is funny.

You think Onky Alexander is a hunk.

You think Rhoma Irama is kampungan.

You carry a 16 oz. jar of sambal to where ever you travel.

Driving a car that is cheaper than $15,000 embarrasses you.

You think dangdut is stupid, but listen to it anyways, because you are homesick.

You are willing to travel 25 miles to buy tahu and tempe.

You are "Dreaming of a WARM Christmas".

You are very good at avoiding potholes and other road hazards.

Your local McDonald's serves rice and sambal.

You think Supermi is a staple food.

You have ever tried passing a Rp 50 coin as a quarter in a US vending machine/pay phone.

You have ever successfully bribed a police officer.

You have ever successfully bribed a customs officer.

You do your shopping in Singapore.

Your drivers license claims you are 5 years older then you really are.

You have ever legally bought pirated software.

You have ever been forced to memorize UUD'45.

You have bought something from a barefooted street peddler.

You know exactly how many islands Indonesia has.

You have ever eaten something sold off a cart on wheels.

You realized that money is everything before you were six.

The first thing that comes to mind when hearing the word "Jakarta" is "macet".

Someone you know has ever ridden on top of a train.

Your daily commute includes thinking up new ways to ride the city bus for free.

You don't mind people being late.

You think standing in line is a waste of time.

You have tried every Monday of your youth trying to avoid upacara bendera.

You have used a mosquito repellant that looks like a coil and is lit on one end.

You use the terms "Ni yee", "-lah" and "Ih, jijay" on daily basis

You know what Pancasila is, what it means and know it by heart.

You complain that movies in America don't have sub-titles.

Your daily conversation may include enactments of TV commercials.

You have ever consulted a dukun.

Your whole class has ever cheated on a test, and gotten away with it.

You have ever spent the night before an exam looking for someone who sells the questions.

You like the smell of terasi.

You think the Thomas Cup is equal to the Super Bowl.

You can name a manufacturer of shuttlecocks/badminton birdies.

You have a 16' satellite dish hidden in your back yard.

You have ever ridden in a motor vehicle with three wheels.

You miss your maid during laundry day.

Your clothing has brand names printed on it that is visible from 50' away.

You attend weddings only until you are done eating.

You have attended weddings that you are not invited to.

You go to McDonald's to get your weekly supply of ketchup, salt, pepper and napkins.

You know more than one music group that stole the tune of Cranberries' "Zombie".

You have a can of Baygon on your kitchen table.

You make major decisions based on gengsi.

You take advantage of Wal-Mart's 30 days money-back-guarantee to "borrow" home appliances.

Someone in your family has extra pockets in his outfit to hide cookies from the all-you-can-eat bar.

You have paid more then $1000 to get your name on your license plate.

When watching TV you regularly find that all the channels broadcast the same thing.

You know more than 10 acronyms/abbreviations.

You set the ring tone of your cell phone as loud as possible.

You spend your weekends at an expensive five star hotel near your house.

You have one of those gigantic 5000 watts stereo system even though you can't turn it as loud as you can since you live in a crowded neighborhood.

Your Toyota Kijang is packed with bull bar, fog lights, roof rail, car alarm, expensive car audio, gold plated emblems, tail light "protector", racing steering wheels, sports muffler, lowered
suspension, 17 inch wheels with expensive tires, etc. Yet you find them not gaul enough.

You are able to squeeze 15 passengers in your Toyota Kijang.

If you're rich, you buy a huge 50.000 dollars imported SUV and demands it to run minimal 12 kilometers with a liter of gas.

You refuse to buy unleaded gas for your imported car even though it costs less than 20 cents a liter.

You have your drivers license at the age of 14.

You got it without any driving tests.

You are unfamiliar with electric stove.

You are even more unfamiliar with microwave ovens.

If you're a student, your main purpose in life is to succeed in UMPTN and get into a Universitas Negeri.

If you've graduated from college, your main purpose in life is to find an easy job with big salary at a foreign company even if you have to stay unemployed for five years to find one.

If you finally got a job, your main purpose in life is now to get a wife/husband that's rich, from a "good" family, and the most importantly good looking in order to memperbaiki keturunan.

You're proud to be Indonesian - and you pass these jokes on to all your Indonesian friends!



dangdude03
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Indonesian people say I am an 'orang kampung' because I wake up every day at sunrise and I like to listen to dangdut music from Rhoma Irama.



sidik
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You're Indonesian when:
you don't mind being late yourself;
you stand at the end of the escalator to plan your next move;
you try to squeeze yourself into the elevator before others leave;
you don't wonder how someone with a salary of $ 5,000.= a year can afford all those luxury;
you stand and collect your cabin luggage when the plane is still running to the gate;
you turn-on your mobile phone in the plane while it is still not allowed;
you think it is normal that in department stores the music is deafening loud.
That's all I know right now.


tunawisma, tunakarya, tunamasalah

Jeroen
Administrator
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You are Indonesian when you don't know there are actually queues at cashiers elsewhere in the world.

Emoticon: Puh!



sidik
User
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Almost forgot:
You're Indonesian when:
you pay for one bowl but you plunder the salad bar at Pizza Hut;
you pay for one person in an all-you-can-eat restaurant but feed the other four persons in your company;
you form a third or fourth lane on a two-lane road;
you drop your waste whereever you wish;
you think that a traffic light on red means carry-on but watchout for police-officers.

Don't get me wrong, people. I love Indonesia, otherwise I will not spend six months every year there.




tunawisma, tunakarya, tunamasalah

Jeroen
Administrator
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You're Indonesian when you use your phone while eating with friends.

Ooh yeah Sidik, I love it too... Emoticon: Puh!



angelina
User
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thanks for the listing... I really enjoyed them coz they are soooo very true !

- an Indonesian working in KL (who misses Jakarta a lot) -



JohanN
User
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You spend Idul fitri at a hotel, because the maid and the cook are off to their own family


Begin de details te vergeten

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You're an Indonesian when you are complaining about someone else's deed while in other time you will do the same.
(Hehehe, does it sound like a confession?)

WJ




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